NO SEX? CANARY IN THE COAL MINE

When you have trouble in the relationship, it often shows up in sexual dysfunction or a major dimishment in sex, overall. Few of us like conflict with the ones we love, but this is unavoidable. You share your most intimate moments--and your money--with your mate. Throw in the challenges of parenting or step-parenting and family-of-origin issues and you see the issues that exist in relationships.

You naturally have different thoughts and emotional reactions to different things and don't think you just need to find a mate who is just like you. First off, that would be really hard, since you're unique. Secondly, you need a different perspective in life to help balance you out and thirdly, resolving conflict actually strengthens relationships. It's like working out--straining your musles--helps build them.

So, you want to accept relationship conflict and you want to learn to resolve it. This is a big, big deal. You want to find a decision or choice in these conflicts that takes both your concerns into account. Not knowing how to do this is the most significant problem in relationships. It's what sinks many marriages.

An indication of significant lack of issue resolution is a major reduction in sex. Not having sex is like the old tale of when coal miners took canaries into the mines with them. If the air was getting bad, the bird would die while there was still time for the miners to get out(hopefully). Think of this as an early warning sign.

When you and your partner stop having sex, this is usually an indication of unresolved conflict between the two of you and whatever is going on, needs your attention. As with most things, it's not absolute. Illness can cause a reduction in sexual enjoyment, as can various major life stresses. However, if you have this level of stress too long, it'll effect you on many levels.

Going months without sexual enjoyment of one another is an indication of something that needs attention. If you've not had sex with your partner for years, you really need to look at what's going on between the two of you.

This is one of the challenges of the various ED drugs. While these can and are used to treat physical issues that are genuine and distressing, erectile difficulty can also signal unresolved relationship problems.Before you deal with this by popping a pill, make sure you and your mate have good communication on the issues facing you.

You deserve to feel good with your partner and you deserve great sex. Finding resolution between the two of you might help with both.